Morning sickness – or rather, all day sickness – is alive and well in my household. It started on Monday (at exactly 6 weeks) and has progressively gotten worse since. I think I am starting to establish a pattern: Sick when I wake up, hold it together until I rush into my building at 6:30 where I promptly make a b-line to the bathroom. Barf. Feel crappy for an hour, but continue to eat everything I already packed for lunch because I’m so hungry. Start to feel better at 7:30 for an hour until the nausea kicks in again. Waver back and forth until lunch time, try to eat, barf again, feel pretty good until about 5:00, eat dinner, get sick again, and then feel fine the rest of the evening. I have tried eating small meals throughout the day. I have tried not eating. Nothing really seems to work…. I feel sick most of the time! What seems to sit well one day does not sit well the next day, and so on.
This is really not fun at the moment.
But you know, I am able to see the silver lining in it. I am not fatigued, which was one of my greatest fears with pregnancy. I feared I would be so tired that I couldn’t or wouldn’t have the energy to exercise. But I am fine as far as energy goes – in fact, I am sleeping so deeply at night with hardly waking up that I have more energy now than I did pre-pregnancy!
My intention today was to journal about the weight changes. I have actually lost weight this week – not intentionally, that’s for sure! I I would LOVE to keep some food down because I am freaking starving!! But I would be lying if I said there isn’t a small part of me that is relieved every time I step on the scale and realize that I haven’t packed on 10 pounds overnight as well. Because it is still hard to face weight gain after losing a lot of weight – even if it’s for a good reason.
I have written before about how, as a formerly obese person, I came to the realization that I would never have enough time as a thin person to enjoy being thin before giving my body over to house another human being for 9 months. Coming to accept that actually helped me be less resistant to the thought of gaining weight again after working so, so hard to take it off and keep it off. Sometimes just admitting you are having a hard time with something helps tremendously.
It’s just another one of those unknowns that bring up fear or anxiety. How much weight will I gain? Will I have a hard time getting it off? Am I doomed or destined to be overweight my whole life? I realize that I am getting ahead of myself, but at the same time, I think it’s good to be somewhat vigilant about these things, as well. Pregnancy isn’t really eating for two in the way that most people think it is. In fact, the first trimester, you only need about 100 calories more a day than you were previously eating. That’s like two handfuls of popcorn, which is not a whole lot! I have gone back and forth in the past 1.5 weeks since learning I was pregnant between “it’s ok, you’re pregnant, go ahead and eat it all and then some” to “good Lord woman, reel it in, would ya?!” I have read that it’s normal to gain between 3-5 pounds your first trimester. Listen, I could gain that in one weekend WITHOUT being pregnant! Personally I feel it’s more realistic to gain up to 10 lbs, but either way, I am thinking there are no hard and fast rules here. Everybody is different. As long as I am (trying) to eat enough for me and Baby Marathoner, and as long as I continue to exercise, I think the weight gain will all work out in the end the way it’s supposed to.
First ultrasound is scheduled for Monday – can’t wait!!
5 comments:
Ugh...I'm sorry your are getting slammed with morning sickness all day!! Maybe you traded energy for being able to keep food down!!
You are right. Every woman is different and their gains during pregnancy will change depending on the person. Just keep eating healthy and exercising and you will have NO problem getting it off after. You have made major lifestyle changes to lose the weight you have. This won't go away and make you overweght for life! I can sympathize with your fears but you will be great!!!
Enjoy your ultrasound....they are so fun!!!
I feel for ya'. I had morning/all-day sickness for the first 3 months and all I wanted to do was sleep.
Your fears about weight gain are understandable but I agree with Nancy - as long as you keep eating healthy and exercising you'll be fine and the weight will come off faster in the end.
I'm so curious how I will be pregnant so reading your blog is definitely a great foreshadowing.
I'm sorry you are dealing with morning sickness. I hope it gets better soon.
Your fears/questions about the scale and weight gain are the stuff I wonder about too because I tend to worry and get ahead of myself. I feel like you are prepared with the right tools to be healthy for you and your baby though. You also have the tools to get the weight off after the baby comes.
oh, sorry you got hit with morning sickness so bad! A...its good, because it means the baby is doing well and the pregnancy is thriving....B...its bad because...well, no explanation needed. We used to tell patients to try to keep a saltine cracker at the bedside, and eat it BEFORE you even get out of bed. Maybe that will help you.
and yes, DO NOT stress over the weight issue. You are that much ahead just by being aware of it. Listen to your body....feed it when it needs to be fed, but feed it good stuff...not junk. Don't worry about low fat or low carb or any of that stuff. As long as you don't treat this like an eating free for all, in whatever you want whenever you want, your body will do what is natural and healthy. A woman's body is amazing and was MADE to have a child growing inside of it. Will you be left with the same exact body you had prepregnancy? No...but you won't be the same as you were before you lost the weight...you just wont. Trust me. I have gone through this Three times and speak from job experience as well. xxoo Anna!
I think the fatigue won't settle in till the third trimester!
I'm sorry you are so sick, how about caffeine free 7 up or slice? Or saltine crackers or bread?
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